for falling in love once in a blue moon and will never get it. i hate myself for not having a stronger bonds with my friend. I hate myself that i feel my friends dont treat me as close even though they know my secret and accepted it. I hate myself for feeling lonely and needy. I hate myself for thinking that i might die any moment and today could be my last. i hate myself to be depress and need anti-depressant from time to time to prevent myself from killing myself. I hate myself for not being stronger to be an individual. I hate myself for how i look how i am not perfect and how stupid my brain get. I hate myself for crying right now. I hate that i feel i got no one to talk to. i hate myself.